Funny & Rude Candles to Light Up Your Christmas Gifting
- Emma Roff
- Nov 9
- 2 min read
If you’re bored of the same old “Winter Wonderland” candles and boring gift sets, you’re in the right place. Our new Christmas candle collection has landed — festive, funny, and full of personality.
These aren’t your standard vanilla-scented, safe little candles. They’re made for people who like their Christmas gifts with a bit of character (and maybe a tiny bit of chaos).
Every candle in this range smells amazing, burns beautifully, and comes with a label that’ll get people talking. They’re the perfect mix of festive and funny — ideal for stocking fillers, Secret Santa, or just because someone deserves a proper giggle this year.
Meet the Collection
You’re a Festive Bitch
For the friend who starts Christmas shopping in October, wears matching PJs in November, and insists on watching Elf every other night. This cheeky candle says it all — you’re a festive bitch, and you know it.
Merry Christmas Bitch
Simple, direct, and guaranteed to get a laugh. The perfect gift for your sweary best mate, your sister, or your favourite colleague. Because “Merry Christmas” sounds better with a bit of attitude.
Merry Fucking Christmas
When a polite “Merry Christmas” just doesn’t cut it. Light this one for the people who are already done with wrapping, cooking, and pretending to love office parties.
Jingle Fucking Bells
For those who are one more Christmas song away from losing it. Light this candle, pour a drink, and let the chaos fade away.
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Fuck This
Made for anyone who’s already over it — the shoppers, the parents, the planners. Light it up, take a breath, and remember: it’s just one day (and at least the candle smells good).
All I Want for Christmas Is Peace and Quiet
We all know someone who wants nothing more than silence and a bit of space. This candle’s for them — a gift that says, “I get it, and I won’t make you play charades.”
Why They’re the Perfect Gift
Smell incredible, look great, and make people laugh.
Perfect Christmas stocking fillers or Secret Santa.
Affordable, funny, and actually useful — what more could you want?
How to Gift Them
These candles are brilliant for:
Secret Santa (if you like watching people giggle nervously)
Stocking fillers for your funniest friends
Office gifts that won’t go unnoticed
Anyone who’s already muttered “I hate Christmas” at least twice this week
Pair one with one of our rude soaps, mugs, or air fresheners for a complete cheeky Christmas bundle.
Make It a Cheeky Christmas
Our new Christmas candles are live, ready to make your gifting season hilarious. Light one up, pour a drink, and spread some seriously sweary Christmas cheer.
Because some candles are cosy… and some say Merry Fucking Christmas.
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